June 8. What comes next?

I’ve had a great rest with Molly’s family, particularly Sawyer who is so happy about everything.  It’s been useful to take the time to decide what’s been happening to me over the last week and what I want from this bicycle ride.
Some of the things I’ve learned about myself are:
I like being on my own and having independence but I don’t do well when I have too much alone time and become isolated. I’ve had tons of contact with my friends and family, actually probably more than I do on a regular basis, but there is isolation in doing something that it’s hard for others to imagine at the moment.  You know, like I’m freezing and it’s 90 in Knoxville. Or it’s raining so much that there’s no open B&Bs because they are trying to avoid being flooded by the lake.
I love to travel  and to tour on a bicycle but probably want more control over where I’m going than just following a trail because it has been created. The adventure cycling maps are fantastic.  They take you off the beaten path and avoid major traffic areas.  They’re as scenic as possible but because of this there are very few grocery stores, restaurants, etc.  I notice that most cross country riders enjoy the idea of eating convenience store foods, lots of sugary treats, burgers, fries, all that fast food stuff but I end up not feeling well with that food and consequently avoid eating as much as I should because I can’t stomach another energy bar, freeze dried meal or diner food.
As an older person, I’m not as flexible about where I sleep.  I actually enjoy camping but I’m probably more sensitive to sketchiness than I was as a younger person or when I’m with some of my male cycling friends. I’ve been to some lovely campgrounds and inns on this trip but I’ve had to work hard to avoid some less than lovely places.
I have trouble making sure I have rest if I’m concerned I need to ride while the weather is better when I know it’s forecast to rain for the next four days. Planning rest is going to be essential in the future and trying to stick to that plan.
All of this is explaining why I’ve decided to stop my cross country trip, go home and reconsider my plans.  During the past week, I’ve dreaded getting started  in the mornings. I’ve been happy riding but dreaded the drudgery and monotony of stopping and starting each day.  It’s been impacting my mood and consequently impacting how I feel about the people and places I’m seeing.
So I’m thinking I will take at least two more bicycle trips this year, probably for up to two weeks, that seems to be my bewitching point.  Maybe this will be with friends, maybe not.  I haven’t felt any fear about being alone, but find being alone for too long is too isolating for me. And I do plan on shorter tours until I’m too old to bike them. I don’t want to lose the joy of touring.
I so appreciate the support I have received for doing this trip. I’m proud of the 900 miles I did and the challenges I managed.  I hope no one feels disappointed or mislead in anyway.